The In-between
Fredonia NY – I’ve just arrived to my office from a class on acting Shakespeare and I await a session for directing a scene to be presented during a guest workshop coming next weekend. I am tired.
As I was sitting in my chair, I almost fell asleep with the door open. Part of it is from watching the Rays lose to Philly last night, but part of it stems from the sheer exhaustion I have upon completing an acting class. I am sometimes too intense.
I seem incapable of containing this intensity. While viewing students work, I just become so caught up with trying to get a grip on what will work best to help them improve, and my desire to help them improve while at the same time give them more self-awareness about how they are working on scenes and on their craft in general seems to overtake me. At the end of class, I shake my head a bit, walk up the stair to my office, remove my glasses, sit, and contemplate once again retirement. I am caught in between: to retire or not to retire; that is the question at the moment. My heart tells me “yes;” my 401K – along with the fact that I love what I do as I am doing it – tells me “no.” A struggle, I think, that will continue for awhile. -twl
